5 Important Reasons Why Parents Should Talk to Their Kids About Sex

Did you ever wonder why parents should talk to their kids about sex?

Nowadays, experts say that you should talk to your kids about sex from a young age. But, the sex talk is a touchy subject, and many parents don’t know how to handle it. I was in the same boat.
Before you start planning what to say and when to have this conversation, find out the reasons why parents should talk to their kids about sex.
You will gain power and motivation to lead this dialogue by knowing the reasons why exactly your children need to hear the truth from you. 

This post is all about the important reasons why parents should talk to their kids about sex.

One Sunday evening in June, my 14-year-old daughter, our dog and I went for a walk on the nearby beach.

When I reached the end of the beach, I sat on a rock, looking out over the sea, and hoped that my daughter would come over to sit beside me. For the past several months, I had been wanting to have a conversation with her about sex, a conversation we had never had before.

She climbed up the little cliff along the beach and sat down beside me (Yes!). It was a calm evening. We had a lovely dinner and even took a nap before heading out. I felt that the timing couldn’t be better. 

So, why had I been wanting to have the conversation with her… badly?

5 Important Reasons Why Parents Should Talk to Their Kids About Sex

REASON #1 Help them make safe decisions

“It is important that children hear the facts from their parents as well as their peers, as parents are best-placed to put the information in the context of values and also to help children to think through issues such as safety.” – Solution Talk.

When you talk to your children about sex openly and honestly, it helps them make safe and responsible decisions. This comes from parent child communication where you tell your child a healthy and accurate perspective on sexual relationships.

If at all possible, you want to do this before they learn about it from the media or their peers, which often involves misinformation. That’s why experts recommend talking to your children about sex from a young age.

REASON #2 Protect them

You can protect your children by talking with them openly about sex.

I know. Many parents are afraid that there might be negative influences from talking about it. But it’s the opposite.

Remember, your focus of this conversation is to:

• Teach your children ways to nurture the natural gift of their sexuality
• Alert them to the ways their sexuality can be distorted

REASON #3 Ongoing, personalised conversations

As a parent, you are in the position to cultivate ongoing conversations with your children around their sexuality. It’s not “The Talk” that happens only once.

Throughout childhood, we should make the effort to intentionally engage with our children in conversations about sex. Of course, pay attention to the unique child sexual development and personality when you do this.

Our body, especially the genitals, is created with the capacity to experience pleasure… as well as the potential to become the source of pain and vulnerability. You can help them learn that.

REASON #4 Provide support & comfort

To me, parenting is about giving my children support & comfort so that they can thrive.

Sex and sexuality seem like a minefield that we can’t avoid. Our children will be exposed to pornography, will engage in sexting or experiment sexually with a friend. They may also have questions about their gender or same-sex desire.

This is why sex education is important from a young age. We can prepare them for walking into the minefield of “sexuality” in the world we are living in.

If you have older children like me, all these things are most likely happening already. In this case, be present and provide support, comfort & guidance they need.

REASON #5 Walk with them

Be brave and walk the minefield of sexuality with your children. It can be a tough journey, but an opportunity for you to truly connect with your children. A healthy parent child relationship is priceless. And, I’m sure they will thank you in future.

Talking to your children about sex doesn’t mean just talking to them about sex. Through the many conversations we may have with our children, we get to teach them about truth, intimacy, love, desire and grace.

As a parent, I believe this is one of the best gifts I can give to my children.

Wrap-up

When I was growing up, I never talked with my parents about sex. But, I do remember this… when I asked my mother certain questions, her answer was “You will know when you grow up.”

That was decades ago. Things have changed since. Now, there is a stronger need for parents to have an ongoing conversation with their children. Starting from a much younger age than we think, at the age of 3 or 4.

Well, about my 14-year-old daughter and me in the evening on the beach. Did I make it? Did I get to have the first sex talk with her?

Yes! I started telling her honestly about how I felt about this conversation. Her response was calm and positive; she told me about topics covered in her school curriculum, both in primary and secondary schools. She also agreed to share with me what she will learn in the coming year.

Relief. I made a start! At the same time, however, I was wondering if it’s just me who was feeling so awkward. Maybe my daughter was able to normalise the talk easily?

Oh, if you are wondering why I left it so late, the answer is simple. I didn’t know! No one told me the importance of sex education by parents.

Yes, I greatly concerned about my daughter stepping into the minefield of “sexuality”. Yes, I was dying to protect her. But, I had no idea how to talk to her about it. I felt helpless.

Around the time when she turned 14, I was deepening my understanding around human sexuality. It was my personal interest. That’s when I discovered the importance of talking to my children about sex. I wished I had the knowledge 10 years ago or before.

But, I say to myself, “It is what it is. It’s better late than never!” The best time to talk to my daughter about sex was 10 years ago. The second best time is now.

So, if you feel like you left it too late, don’t be discouraged. Remember the reasons why parents should talk to their kids about sex. Start conversations and give the support they need.

This post was about 5 important reasons why parents should talk to their kids about sex.